Bedtime battle

Sleep is overrated anyway
Sleep is overrated anyway

The bedtime battle this evening has left me exhausted. But I can’t go to sleep yet as I still, somehow, have to transfer the toddler and her duvet from the sofa downstairs to her bed upstairs without waking her or causing injury to either of us.

It took me hours to get the baby to sleep…she blew raspberries in my weary face and slapped me with her flailing arms and mocked me with her wide awake-ness. When she eventually drifted off I ran the gauntlet of the stairs with tomorrow’s laundry pile draped on it, tried (and failed) to avoid the creaky floorboards in the landing and, upon arriving at the cot, found that Catrin, the helpful toddler, had put her own baby doll slap bang on the middle of the mattress. A tricky balancing exercise followed as I attempted to place the real baby in her cot while, simultaneously and without making a sound, removing the plastic baby. It was a scene to rival something from an Indiana Jones film and I felt utterly triumphant to have managed all of that and to have avoided waking up baby Bethan.

Seconds later my jubilance was crushed by the over-tired Catrin waking up in her bed a few metres away. She had also, despite desperately needing a proper sleep, been a pain to get to bed. She had been up and down the stairs so often that I was considering installing a Stannah stairlift to reduce wear on the carpet. She started to make whiny squeaky noises, which rapidly increased in volume and she would not tell me what the matter was or go back to sleep or moan a bit more quietly.

To avoid waking up the just-asleep Bethan I had to carry Catrin downstairs in her duvet and deposit her on the sofa unceremoniously. The whiny squeaking continued. The snot increased. It went on until I offered to administer Calpol (the ‘magic medicine’). At that point she retreated into her duvet in the manner of a prodded snail and fell silent.

She is asleep now, but on the sofa. I can’t leave her there as she will inevitably roll off it at some point and the whole street will know about it. Can I run the gauntlet successfully a second time…?


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